Hey. Yeah, it’s me again. Your inner monologue, your pesky left hemisphere that is constantly talking to you without shutting up. Except for that time when you got that really good weed. That calmed both of us down for quite awhile. Or that time when you got a concussion and I started speaking Finnish, and you don’t speak Finnish? Yeah… good times.
I know I can be downright nasty and make you think thoughts that are really kinda out there, and have no grounding in reality, but I do it because I love you. I love us. (We’re out of cereal.) And I want to keep us awake to all the possibilities that are out there. You have the tools to do incredible things, and I have the organization and optimization skills to keep us on track. (And the waffles you love are on sale this week.) I know the road looks long and arduous, and there are going to be trees down in the middle of the road, but I happen to know my way around chainsaws (and bad metaphors), so that they won’t be a problem. (Don’t forget that massage appointment you have tomorrow.)
I’ve been with you all your life, talking your ear off (mostly) the whole time, and nothing bad has happened, right? There have been times when we were embarrassed or said and done things we wish we could take back, but we got over them. When we stood nose to nose with fear and the unknown and didn’t back down, we were unstoppable. (You need to put your milk back in the fridge.) We worked awesome as a team, and I ain’t going nowhere. (Unlike your milk if you don’t put it back in the fridge.)
All I beg of you is to meet your end of the bargain. I’m just a measly voice that resides in the deep recesses of your mind, but you, you’ve got a real voice (and laundry to be done!) and arms and legs and goals and dreams. I’m not anything without you.
So please, trust that I know what we’re doing. And that even though you may fail at first and get rejected (Tax day is coming up soon, we need to get on that!), know that people who never fail never succeed—Ooh! You should write that down!—and you’re not a quitter. (You haven’t checked Facebook in 5 minutes… you could have missed something BIG!) You are destined to find happiness and success because you deserve it. (Facebook!)
Now let’s polish off some of that Kahlúa that is staring you in the face, mix it with that room temperature milk over there, and have ourselves a mini party. Because I need more excitement. (And turn the heat down. It's roasting in here.)
Yours, (FACEBOOK!)
Your inner monologue.
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